Well, things turned to shit in the last couple of days. Too much resistant starch, probably, and I became irritable and depressed, like so many times before. I had about 3 tablespoons of cooked and cooled rice per day for a couple days – 1 TBS with each meal – and that put me over the edge. I’ve been more depressed than this, so it could be worse, but I was really hoping the good Elixa bugs would crowd out this gram negative monster in my gut. So far, not crowding. That mother is alive and well.
I received my VSL3 probiotic in the mail yesterday. I’m feeling deflated at this point. If 3 trillion probiotics in 6 days can’t make a dent I’m just not optimistic.
I guess I could just accept that I can’t eat starches. Ever. And that if I do choose to eat other things with fiber – say, whole fruits or vegetables – I’m just not going to feel great. Part of what bothers me about all this is that it’s really expensive to eat nothing but meat. I want to be able to fill up on rice like my husband, kid, and all of Asia. I know I’m whining right now, but I don’t care. I’m just so sick of this.
Zero carb all day every day is gross after a few months. I really like meat and eggs and they’re simple – no waste, not much appetite, no blood sugar fluctuation, but also no calcium, too much phosphorus, high BUN/Creatinine ratio and metabolic acidosis. I don’t really know what to do anymore. I guess I could cut back to one teaspoon of cooked and cooled rice per day and gradually work up. Then I’ll only feel slightly shitty every day.
I stopped with the rice today, and the tears have again dried up. Still irritable though.